


no more (cross the line)

by heecheondo (bERUkUN)



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: 12 Princes Fest, 12 Princes Fest April+May Fest, :(, Established Relationship, M/M, POV Alternating, POV Third Person, Secret Relationship, lapslock, lowkey wanna tag more but spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-30
Updated: 2018-05-30
Packaged: 2019-05-02 14:59:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14547252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bERUkUN/pseuds/heecheondo
Summary: jaehyun liked staying at juyeon's, resting by the sunset, ignoring his worries on the younger's arms. behind those doors was their personal world and everything was perfect.he loved the younger but feared for the worst. he couldn't tell anyone, for their happiness, and he was okay with it.juyeon liked staring at jaehyun's laziness, adored seeing him peacefully reading, solving puzzles or just sleeping. it was beautiful and mostly enjoyable, except for the fact he could only do so behind those doors.thatwasn't enjoyable at all.he loved the older and was tired of having to keep it to the two of them only. he didn't care if he would receive hate or anything like that if it meant being truthful about his heart.





	no more (cross the line)

**Author's Note:**

> me: i delayed my march prompt so much i should not write for this next month--  
> me, looking at the spreadsheet for this months' [fic fest](https://twitter.com/tbzficfest): only 3 out of 5 prompts got claimed? i guess.... i have no other choice.... but participate this month too..... i mean look at this very angsty jujae...... i might not ship it That much but it's.... perfect.... and unclaimed.... how could i Not....  
> (basically i got no control over my life and sold my soul for this fic fest pls send help)  
> title from [the girlgroup everyone should stan's debut song, uni.t's no more](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cMTxBCB_o78) and betaed by my bitch [mei](https://twitter.com/cupidkrystals) i wub u beach! ;)  
> 
> 
> * * *
> 
> _prompt #4:_
> 
>   * _by: Martina (tbzart)_
>   * _jaehyun just really enjoys sitting down on the floor right on front of that one big window in juyeon's apartment, read some stuff, lose himself right there between all the pieces of a puzzle of a picture of the city that he has been trying to put together for weeks, or just laying there with his eyes closed and head rested against juyeon's lap. juyeon really enjoys watching how much the sun coming from through the window loves jaehyun; but what he doesn't enjoy that much is the fact that they have to hide their relationship outside that apartment filled with sunlight. !_
>   * _juyeon + jaehyun (hyunjae)_
>   * _UH angsty fluff ?? yeah. i just wanted a really soft and aesthetic au of jaehyun spending days just sun-bathing on juyeon's floor, lazy kisses, cuddling on rainy spring days between white blankets when the sun is hidden, and a hella whipped juyeon. but of course there's some angst as always and it is the fact that jaehyun is really insecure about the idea of making their relationship public, why? your pick; he's scared of what will people think, his parents wouldn't approve, he hasn't fully accepted his sexual orientation, whatever you want, is up to you !! but as always, please a happy ending and soooome nice soft hours :::::'')))))))_
> 


jaehyun slowly opened his eyes, staring at the window that was now showing off the sun's brightness. juyeon was not by his side, but by the smell coming from what he assumed was the kitchen, he wasn't far.

he felt like he shouldn't be here but oh well, it was sunday and he was too lazy to move. besides, it wasn't every day that he could stay the night at the younger’s, and he decided he would enjoy every single possible, indoors. his responsibilities and image could come later, at least for a day.

he was about to get up when the door opened. “don't you dare to leave this bed young man”, juyeon said, his characteristic fox-grin on.

“i'm your hyung. and hungry. your hungry hyung.”

“who is probably very warm, and it's fall, almost winter, so i brought breakfast in bed.”

jaehyun dramatically gasped. “you didn't.”

“yes i did, and here it is”, he said, still smiling at the older. “so you won’t freeze to death just to get some food.”

“i don’t deserve you”, he said smiling, attention towards his breakfast. “won't you eat too?”, he asked the younger after taking a bite in his galbi.

“nah, I ate already. I'll just watch you eating with adoration in my eyes.”

“whipped”, jaehyun joked.

juyeon smiled at him, but for some reason, it felt sad. the older boy didn't understand why he would give him such look, but decided to let it slide and keep eating.

“do you really have to go later?”, the younger asked him once the breakfast was fully devoured. “you just finished promotions.”

“yeah, but that only means getting ready for the next one”, he said, but then embraced the other. “but i don’t need to go now. we still have some time.”

his lover smirked. “yeah?”

“yeah”, jaehyun weakly said, and took no time into kissing him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

it wasn’t always that they could stay like this. sure they were both in their mid-twenties and had grown enough to live their lives however they wanted, but jaehyun worried. jaehyun was 25, a free soul, and very much gay, but he was also very much public which, consequently, didn’t allow him to be as free as he wished. he was an _idol_ , one that had four years dedicated to not only music but also a few dramas here and there. he and his team members have gone through a lot before they got the recognition they had, and sure they weren’t legendary as dbsk or as big as exo or bts, but they still had a very solid and large fanbase, expecting him to be exactly how he portrayed himself to the cameras. he had to be perfect.

and no one who’s perfect is gay. that’s the rule number one, probably. so he told juyeon, _sure we can date, but we can’t be public about it_. and juyeon said _sure_ back. so everything was okay: they were happy, they were together, and no one got hurt. not his job, nor juyeon’s, nor any of their reputation, nor even their emotions. everything was perfect.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

when juyeon arrived home, he found the older laying down on the floor, a big blanket around him and a big puzzle of something that seemed a city slowly being formed. the sunset shining from the window behind him was so pretty it could as well be a dream. the scene was too ethereal for the younger not to appreciate, so he took his phone and captured a few pictures before moving closer to jaehyun. “hey babe.”

“oh, hello there~”, he said in a soft tone. “you are early.”

“and you don’t live here”, he remarked with a grin. “didn’t i give you that key for _emergencies_ only?”

jaehyun pouted. “come on, juyeon-ah. i knocked and you weren’t home, you wanted me to freeze outside and wait for you?”

the other made a fake-thoughtful face. “maybe, that doesn’t sound too bad.”

the pout got bigger. “wow, you’re such a meanie! i have a two-day break and decided to come here to enjoy them with you and that’s how you treat me?”

he blinked. “you _what_?”

the older stopped to pout so he could smile. “you heard me. the company thought that we hadn’t had much rest since we promoted three mini albums so close to each other, so they gave us two days to do whatever. we. want. to!”, he said pausing the last words, poking the younger’s cheek with his warm hands.

“wow. they make you work nonstop for nine months and you rest for two days. what a great company they are.”

jaehyun scoffed. “take what you can, okay, darling?”, he laughed at juyeon’s face. “well, you should probably take a shower, then i will cook us some dinner, alright?”

the other glared at him. “we both know i cook the best out of us two.”

he rolled his eyes. “you eating my food once per _year_ won’t kill you!”

juyeon shrugged. “i don’t know, last time i nearly choked with your excuse of a chicken.”

he watched as the older gasped way too loudly and laughed at him. “what an ungrateful brat!”

“it’s because i love you hyung. and your silly reactions.”

the older groaned in disgust. “you’re weird.”

“and you love me too, i know”, he said, winking, and moved towards his well-deserved shower.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

of course juyeon would fucking say sure. if the man you love told you he could only be yours behind doors, would you say no or would you take whatever you could?

he was the type to get whatever he could and silently hope that this whatever would be something special in the older’s heart and soon become something worth to fight for. he was like that since day one, and he told him that everything would end in the end because love always wins. that’s what he told himself for the years they spent together, even since they were just trainees chasing a dream together. that is, until juyeon couldn’t take the pressure of being forced to pretend someone he was not and quit because, if he was going to be an idol, he’s going to be himself and not someone for the cameras and fangirls to idolise. so he quit, became a dance teacher for kids instead, and honestly it was the best decision of his life. he was himself and he was glad.

but it was _killing_ him to keep another part of himself a secret. he wanted to shout to the world how much in love he was with lee jaehyun, how precious he was, how beautiful he was, inside and outside. but he couldn’t, because the older liked to smile at the camera and talk about how his ideal woman was. it didn’t matter that in the end he was describing juyeon except for the change of pronouns, because it still hurt.

it hurt and he had enough.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

jaehyun was sleeping on the younger’s couch, the man not too far from him, cuddling and petting his hyung’s curly hair. he adored him so much, he thought, heart going warm. if only he could do it all the time, and not only the few times the older knocked in. if only he could wake up beside him every day, rest by his side every night, eat breakfast together as they went to their respective jobs.

but it would never happen, probably. not if he let this stay as it is right now.

“what are you thinking about?”, he heard the idol’s weak voice, meaning he had just woken up. the other sighed, not really wanting to do this now, and just shook his head, faking a smile. jaehyun stared at him for a while but decided to let it be, hugging the younger tighter. winter would soon fade but it was still cold and the older wanted to enjoy the little time they had like this.

juyeon did too, because he didn’t know what would happen the moment he decided to open up. maybe, when he does, it’ll be their last day. but as much as he wanted to avoid it, he couldn’t just pretend.

it was the right thing to do.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“i can’t do this anymore”, juyeon said suddenly. jaehyun had just arrived and the door just shut down behind him, so he was pretty much confused as to where this had come from. “we have to end this.”

he kept staring at the place’s owner, expecting it to be a prank. it wasn’t, he was as serious as he’d always been. “what do you mean by this?”

“this! us!”, he said in a frustrated tone, motioning to them both. “i want to break up.”

“you what? but i thought we were fine.”

“we are. we are _super_ fine. _in here_ ”, he sighed. “there is an entire world outside and we are not fine out there. we are not even a we out there, lee jaehyun, and i can’t do this anymore.”

the older breathed in slowly. “i told you that i can’t do it, it would ruin both of us.”

“i don’t mind! i don’t care if i lose my job if it means being able to love you openly.”

“but i do mind! i mind if you lose your job, i mind if you get hated because of me and i wouldn’t be able to bare it!”

juyeon stared at the older, face without an expression, trying to contain his anger. “hyung, i love you. and i don’t want to hide it. but if you want to, the door is open”, he said calmly, opening the door again.

“you can’t do this to me, juyeon-ah.”

“you can’t tell me to hide my true self and say it’s for my own good. i’m soon twenty-five and made up my mind. so, if you don’t agree, it’s over.”

jaehyun wanted to protest more. wanted to change his mind and tell him everything would be fine, wasn’t it so fine moments before? they could talk it over! but a look at juyeon’s face, shining determination but also with hints of sadness, he just looked down and left.

and he didn’t need to look behind to know he had hurt him deeply.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

jaehyun didn’t text, nor call, nor anything. juyeon sighed, letting the tears fall until he fell asleep.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

juyeon didn’t block his number, but he should have, because now jaehyun was tempted to try to contact him, but he didn’t know what to say to fix this. he could’ve done a bigger harm and the younger would hate him forever.

jaehyun should probably prove him first that he _did_ love him and wanted to be with him. he wasn’t sure how he would do it, he just knew he had to fix it, somehow.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

it was nearly a month since then and everything was fine. fine as in miserable, because as much at he believed to have done the right thing, juyeon was dying inside. it hurt so bad, he loved him so much but now he was gone. he was gone for something he saw as futile but the older prioritized so much and it only made him more miserable.

he wished he was someone worth to fight for, but maybe the older wasn’t on the same page.

he sighed. he felt like simply sleeping, since he had no work for the next two days, but then his phone vibrated. and then again, and again. he decided to check, and realized he still had the notification of jaehyun’s twitter on. he hadn’t tweeted in weeks so he forgot that. he was just going to turn it off until he read his most recent tweets.

oh. wait,  _what_?

he got up, throwing his phone somewhere in his bed and ran towards the door. indeed, now that he wasn’t focusing somewhere else, he noticed the knocking, and once he opened it, there was lee jaehyun with his phones in hand looking tired.

“what”, juyeon smartly said. “what are you doing here?”

“fixing this”, he said painting and had he ran towards his place? “look, i’m sorry i kept it hidden and you’re free to despite me for that. i thought it would be for the best, i honestly did, but i only hurt you instead and i will never forgive myself for that. i love you, lee juyeon.”

the younger could sense the tears falling but ignored them. “what about your job? your image? they’re important for you.”

the older sighed. “fuck it. they’re not more important than you.”

the two of them stayed like that, just staring at each other awkwardly. juyeon didn’t know what to say and jaehyun kept looking at him, expecting a reaction that never came. he looked down.

“well, that’s all. it’s okay if you don’t want to be with me anymore, i get it”, he quietly said, turning around. but then, he felt the younger move and hug him from behind.

“i love you too hyung”, he said weakly. “thank you. it must’ve been hard for you to do this.”

he breathed in and out slowly. “yeah, but then i thought about you and letting you hurt without trying to fix it would be harder.”

“thank you, really. thank you thank you thank you…”

“hey, that’s a lot of thank yous”, the older laughed.

“it’s because i’m super thankful, i love you so much hyung. i can’t wait until i can post our selfies on my instagram account.”

jaehyun rolled his eyes but smiled. “can you let me go so i can hug you properly?”

“ah, sure”, juyeon did as told, waiting for a hug.

he got a kiss instead.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“aren’t you the one lying on the internet now?”, juyeon said looking up from his phone.

“i’m not. we _are_ cuddling.”

“correction, you’re resting your head on my shoulder without further physic contact.”

jaehyun rolled his eyes, leaving the younger’s shoulder and hugging him from behind - as much as he could since they were both sitting on the couch. “happy now?”

“i can’t believe you”, he said rolling his eyes. “also why are you tweeting when we’re watching dramas together?”

“it’s the advertisement break! and, well”, he kissed the younger’s cheek, “because i want to show everyone how lucky i am.”

he snorted. “cheesy.”

“but you love it.”

juyeon smiled at the older. “yeah, i do.”

**Author's Note:**

> in this au the boyz are a 10 member group without juyeon and haknyeon. useless psa.  
> since the prompt wanted something aesthetic/soft about jaehyun lazying around juyeon's, i decided to limit myself into writing only scenes in his place (which was weird because i had already started writing a scene outside it before i decided it and had to throw it away. rip). it was a challenge ;_____; pls forgive me if this ended up messy or with some plot holes here and there (since i didn't write much of their lifes outside) plus the typoes in the tweets i refused to fix because /making them/ were already too much of a bother but anyway i'm experimenting! dont hate me much!  
> [tweetz](https://twitter.com/heecheondo) n [see see](https://curiouscat.me/heecheondo) pls talk to this lonely lozer


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